Hi, I'm Harley
I started this blog to have an outlet for what is my life. Some source for me to put my thoughts into words to make sense of what goes on around me.
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I guess I'll use this as my intro, so you can learn a little about me.
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I have an obsession with Pineapples | I love all things interior design | I'm a student | I have the thinnest thick skin | I live in a pink house | Little things excite me | I literally live on my deck
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I guess I'll use this as my intro, so you can learn a little about me.
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I have an obsession with Pineapples | I love all things interior design | I'm a student | I have the thinnest thick skin | I live in a pink house | Little things excite me | I literally live on my deck
Why I don't think I'm rude when I don't speak
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So my bestfriend and I (yeah, I said bestfriend) were having a [drunken] conversation about why we don't have friends. Of course. And I asked her what she thought about why I don't seem to have a lot of girlfriends, and she told me without missing a beat that I come off as a bitch a lot of the time.
This got me thinking about some of the things I do that may be taken out of context. The number one thing I do that is "bitchy" is I don't speak unless approached by someone in public. The reason behind this is really all through high school I wasn't that popular, not a lot of people knew who I was. So now as an adult I think that has bled into my personality, or really more so what I think of myself. I assume that just because I recognize you in public, that doesn't mean that you know who I am. I see people all the time that I've met a few times, but I don't say hey because I don't want you to think I am weird because I know who you are but you don't know who I am. I can't be the only one right? |
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Blog 11.6.18The difference between being a "with-holder" and protecting yourself. First of all, for those of you who haven't been called this or have been told not to be a "withholder", a "withholder" is someone who is withholding love and affection. For example, if you and your spouse get into an argument and right before bed they tell you they love you and you don't respond, you are withholding love. If your mom goes to give you a hug and you just stand there with your arms limp and don't hug her back, you are withholding affection.
Got it? Okay, so growing up this was a term my family frickin' lived for! It was like the damn scarlet letter of my family. Worst part is, my family was the type that if you did something wrong and got in trouble the whole family knew about it by the week's end. Point being, I was raised to above all else not withhold love. Period. Fast forward to 23 year old Harley, I still have this hanging over my head. But it gets used in a different way now. See, I don't associate with different people in my family anymore for one reason or another. Therefor when I get Snapchats or texts from them, I don't respond. I still get called a "withholder", but it isn't because I am withholding love, it is because I'm protecting myself. I'm not not responding in an effort to hurt the feelings of those people, I am keeping a distance because they are not positive aspects of my life. If you had someone who was a friend at one time, but lied, manipulated you, and said bad things about you, you wouldn't keep them as a friend right? Well same principal applies. Yes, I know you can't just not be friends with family, but that doesn't mean you have to subject yourself to their bullshit. I chose me. I chose to not do "what I'm supposed to" by societies standards, I chose to walk away and stay away from those who don't deserve me. I chose to not stick around for the next malicious verbal beating. I could get more into my family drama, hell one day I might. Tonight isn't that night. But I did want to clear that up. You are allowed to bow out gracefully from a relationship that is no longer mentally or emotionally healthy. It is not okay to withhold love from someone you love just because they did or said something you didn't like. Know the difference, and stick to your convictions. **For those back reading, do me a favor, next time you post on Instagram, use the hashtag #myunfilteredeveryday. I want to see who all is back, because I sure as hell am!** |
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Blog 11.3.18
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So I was at the dreaded Wal- Mart the other week and I had something interesting (to me) happen. I was in the check out line and to paint the picture for you there was one woman in front of me, and by her accent it was obvious that she was from somewhere in the UK. For the sake of the story we will just call her cat lady. She also had copious amounts of wet cat food, but I don't suppose that is too important to the story... just odd. There were two young girls that were checking out customers, one was training. Lets call them trainee and trainer.
I had just gotten off a 10 hour shift and was tired as hell, so I just waited in line and played on my phone. I am a bid of a nosey nora so I was eavesdropping a little on their conversation, I couldn't make out most of it but I did catch the ass end, and it was glorious... pun intended. So I'm standing there looking at my phone and notice that the conversation in front of me goes silent, like an awkward silent. Then all of a sudden the cat lady says loud as hell, "What do you think of that Trump?! Isn't he the worst?!" I perked up really quick, not just because of what was said but because you really have no idea how loud this woman was. The two girls at the check out were just like "Yeah, oh my God, the worst!", "He's been the worst president ever!" There were a few other things said, but you get the point, right? I made eye contact with the check out girl, unintentionally, but still happened. Cat lady finished checking out and guess what, she forgot to get more wet cat food. So she tried to go back through the line, I was polite but asked her to go the other way because there was a line and that was rude. I walk up to the check out counter and the check out girl I made eye contact with said hello to me in the oddest way, it was almost like she was talking to a wounded deer. I think she was concerned that I was going to say something. Or at least that's the vibe I got. I was nice, asked how they were and made small talk about how amazed they were by the woman who checked out before me and her accent. Anti-climactic right? I could tell you more about our conversation but it would change the way you might think about the two check out girls and for the point I want to make that wont help. |
The point I want to make is that 4 years ago I would have gotten offended to hell and back and I may have even said something. I guess now is the time were I tell you I am a Republican.
Now, I could have gotten upset and offended and told them all the facts to back why I disagree, but I didn't. I didn't feel it was necessary. Me getting upset wouldn't change their minds, but why could I need to change their minds? Why is it that we feel the need to change the opposing side's mind all the time? I don't think that it's important to me to discuss political opinions any more because well I figure it just feeds into the ignorance. Just because my opinion is different from someone else's doesn't make me right or them wrong. It makes us different. If I'm being honest, I think it's healthy to surround yourself with those of differing opinions, successes, backgrounds, and educational statuses. When you can have a conversation about differing opinions it can open you up to things, ideas, and facts that you may not have been aware of. I feel that if you can open yourself up to being comfortable in your own to not just listen but to absorb someone else's truth, you grow as an adult. I am almost 24, and I know that I still have growing to do, so next time you meet someone who disagrees with your opinion, don't get upset about it. They are allowed to not agree with you. Politics can be heated to say the least, it's important to our lives as Americans, but they don't have to be an argument all the time. That's my thoughts on that. Sorry for the ridiculously long blog, but it was a big thought! 
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Blog 7.2.18
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I'd like to start off by acknowledging that I have been a shit blogger lately...
I plan to change that and post 3 times a week. Period. So If you keep up with this blog- keep me accountable and call me out! Onward. I wanted to talk about a quote I got from one of my all time favorite guilty pleasure Netflix shows; Queer Eye! Ahh, love it! If you haven't watched it yet, you are missing out sister! 10 out of 10 totally recommend! "Give me my flowers now, not later" Kay, so what this means is tell me now how much you appreciate me, or something I did, not later (or ever). Meaning, *I know it's redundant* don't wait until my funeral to be my best friend or talk about how close we were. I need to know these things now. It also made me thing to tell the people in my circle how much I love and appreciate them. As humans we need to have that connection to survive. And as someone who has severe anxiety (yes, yet another young adult talking about anxiety- get over it), it's the difference in literally feeling loved or like you want nothing to do with me. I personally need that validation. I know it may sound "needy", or "superficial" to feel the need/ want to know that I am wanted/loved/appreciated but it's just they way it is. Don't wait until it's too late to tell those close to you how much they mean to you. Give them their flowers now, not later. Who knows you may absolutely make their day by just reminding them of the role they play in you life. I know it sends me over the moon when one of my friends sends me a text just saying, Hey, hope you have a good day. We all need to be more conscious of maintaining the relationships we have and we need to make sure we are watering the flowers we want to keep in our garden. Yes, I'm fully aware that I wear this shirt literally all the time
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Total basic-ass picture of me and my Orange Nectar of The Gods!
Basic picture for my basic ass life lol. *Self Deprecation Alert* |
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Blog 6.16.18So I was totally going to do some in depth life update today but I got hit in the dick by the most amazing thing everrrr!
So Stephen and I are doing some shopping in Summerville for stuff for our vacation WHICH WE LEAVE FOR FRIDAYYYYY BITCHES! Anywho... so were shopping and he wants a Buxie--- Starbucks. And we are over by the Lowes ya know, and I see the "Fusion" Juice Bar that I see all the time and I thought I would go in there any try it out. Y'ALL! Can we just take a moment to pay our respects for the lost years I had without this place?! They have juices, smoothies, and bowls! I got some Morning Glory Juice which had Pineapple juice, Orange juice, Carrot, and Cucumber. So damn amazing! Ahh! I also thought I'd be a little ballsy and get a shot... but to my disappointment there was no Vodka. Just juice. But it was tasty too. It was beet and turmeric. The beet was sweet then the turmeric knocks you on your ass. Wow, I just realized I'm cussing a shit ton today. Oh well. Anyways back to the juice... so good! 10 out of 10 would totally recommend going by and trying it out. I'm usually not into the "basic", "hippy" shit like that, but I would totally give up my man card to go back! |
Blog 6.11.18 |
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So I am not close with any of my bridesmaids from when I got married back in 2015. Not a one, not even my M.O.H. I want to put this disclaimer out there first before I get into the story:
1. This is my side of the story. 2. This all took place almost 3 years ago- everyone involved is over it- I'm just telling a story 3. I got married at 20- we were all young. So here's the story, I will start with my MOH; she and I had been friends since the 3rd grade, so about 12 years at the time that I got married. She and I had been off and on again over the last 2 years leading up to my engagement, we were literally making up from a fight when I told her I was getting married and asking her to be my MOH. *again my side of things* her boyfriend and I did not like each other whatsoever! My opinion is that when she was mad at him, she would tell me, when she was mad at me, she would tell him, thus making us only see the bad side of each other... and he was a douche to me every chance he got. He even told my photographer AT MY WEDDING, "yeah, I don't really like Harley", like who the hell does that? I knew he didn't like me, but don't talk shit at my wedding guy. She and I just stopped talking after the wedding. I think a combination of her boyfriend and the fact that I was probably annoying by always asking her if she had done the few things I asked her to do prior to the wedding. She she is an amazing artist and I asked her to paint a few things (windows with the menu, mine & Stephen's name, and important dates) and when we were less than a month out and they still weren't done, I may have gotten a little snippy with her. But can you blame me?! Second, now this happened between 2 of the girls. I was getting SUPER close with one girl (she was one of Stephen's friends' girlfriend) & there was some private information I knew about her and it was actually what she and I bonded over. Myself, Stephen, her boyfriend, and her were a little foursome for about a year. Well another bridesmaid was at my house and we were just having a normal conversation and I let a small tid-bit of the private info slip. TOTAL ACCIDENT!! And she asked about it, and I in the most PC way possible explained what I was talking about. But in no way did I say anything mean, or hateful. But that bridesmaid who was also beginning to get close to the other took what I said and ran with it. This wasn't the first time that I had heard about this girl doing something like that, but the girl I was starting to get close to was upset nonetheless and pretty much called me everything but a human being and told me to kick rocks (not in those words). So now we are 3 down. One to go. So this last girl actually stuck around for another year and a half. I actually ended the friendship with her. See she and I were friends in high school, we all have that friend that is cool because they are able to do things that our parents wouldn't let us. She was my "party friend" not that she was a bad person. But I was very mild in comparison to her, we balanced each other out. Well she was getting married and had asked me to be in her wedding (over a text) and I was working full time and in school Saturday and Sunday, I had explained that to her and that I wouldn't be available for a lot of pre-wedding things until I was out of class. Well she had asked me to come to a few things and I was unable to attend, and eventually she got upset (naturally) and blew up at me. *Disclaimer- my husband didn't really like me spending time with her because there was always drama and drinking involved & something bad always happened* Like one night she got us shot at... yeah you read that right. Different story for a different night. But anyway, I wasn't as invested in the "friendship" anymore and told her that I was sorry that I was not able to attend things, I re-explained the whole school thing and told her that maybe I shouldn't be in the wedding. She "told me off" and I told her I was sorry she felt that way and that maybe we shouldn't be friends. We haven't spoken since. So that's it. If I'm being honest, which I make myself be here; I really only miss one of these girls, and that is the third I mentioned. We still see each other, were nice, it is what it is. What happened was almost 3 years ago at this point and I speak for the both of us when I say it's in the past. Will we be friends again one day? Maybe, I don't know. I wouln't turn her away if she showed up and needed something, but a lot was said and done. Stephen is still friends with her fiance and that's nice. Life is long, and a lot happens who am I to try to tell the future. People are in our lives for a reason, it may be because we need them or they need us, either way they are there as long as necessary. Some people are life long friends, and some are temporary, but when a friendship ends it's important to remember that it happened because it needed to. |
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Blog 6.6.18
Life has been a little cray so heres an update! If you watched my Unfiltered | My Truth Video you know that I was struggling with figuring out what I wanted to do with my life. Well, I am pleased to announce I have made a decision! Additionally I had a crazy hair catastrophe I'll tell you about too!
But one thing at a time, so I have made the decision to step away from Real Estate. I will keep my license active, but I needed something that would facilitate going back to college... yup I said it, I'm going back to college in the Fall. I will finish my MBA in Medical Administration. I am over the moon excited to start this new chapter in my life. I always felt that I would just have to "go with" a degree eventually, and now I have found something that I can really get behind and be proud of. See I wasn't what you would consider "proud" to be a Real Estate Agent. I felt like it was a flaky job & that others looked at me as such as well. I know that that isn't the case, that not everyone looked at it that way and that it was mainly just me. But isn't that all that matters? Isn't it my opinion that at the end of the day counts above all others? I cant express how grateful I am to have parents and a husband who could see that I was not enjoying life as it was and needed to make a change, whatever that change may be. I think it is so important to be unforgivingly honest with yourself. We all have that little voice that will say "Gosh I am not happy, I wish I could do blah blah blah", but we tune it out because we think we are being childish or unreasonable. And for me I tuned that voice out for a long time. I felt that I had to just get a job because I needed to provide, and though that may be true to some degree, I really needed to further my education. I had all the opportunity in the world when I got out of high school, I was accepted to all my top pick schools, but my life was in shambles at that time and the best option for me was to stay local and go to community college. Now, if I am ever going to go for it, now is the time! So remember, just because you get a later start doesn't mean that you cant ever start. Life is fluid and ever changing- go for what you aspire to be and damn the rest.
On to number two! Now that I am over all the mushy shit! My hair gave me a run for my money this weekend! Ill put all the pictures below of what the hell happened. It all started Saturday morning at 10:30am. I arrived at the salon wich I wont name- I live in moncks corner y'all, it's a small town and shit gets around. But I went in there for a 10:30 appointment to and I quote, "darken my roots and maintain my ashy blonde color". I came out with PURPLE HAIR and BLACK ROOTS! I lost my ever lovin' mind! I got home and waited for Sunday to roll around and washed my hair. It turned the color of dish water!!! Fricken' dish water! Yellow, grey, purple... ew... with black roots. Lets not forget about those black roots. I went from honey blonde hair that I loved to dish water black roots. I literally looked like a crack head! Mind you I didnt leave there until almost 5! That just added insult to injury.
And what salon is open on a Sunday?! NONE! But I found one, in North Charleston! I cant begin to tell you how elated I was that someone was willing to help me! When she answered the phone she just told me to get there ASAP so she could see what she was working with. She told me straight up that I would not be blonde, but at that point I didnt care, I just wanted to look "normal" again! So she put some darker blonde and light brown on my head and let me sit for a lil minute. I was in her salon for all of an hour and a half. She talked to me like I had been there 1,000 times!
I now have brown hair, I have been on this Earth... earth... is it supposed to be capitalized? for almost 24 years and I have always been a little blonde headed baby. If any of you have changed your hair color you know that feeling... that... holy shit what have I done feeling. But I love it. It's something I have always wondered about, "what would I look like with brown hair?" and now I know. I am supposed to go back in 6 weeks to get highlights put in, and I have never felt more excited and comfortable with a hair stylist before. I have had a friend do my hair and I still didn't feel as comfortable as I do with this woman.
So this may be a review of sorts but 10 out of 10 would totally recommend.... Cassie's Salon on River's Ave in North Chuck: http://cassiesphotoparlor.com/
Blog 5.23.18
Literally my favorite Thai Restaurant in all of Charleston- found in Downtown Summerville.
But notice the small sign at the left part of the window hah
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Blog 5.22.18Today we have so much self-deprecation in our everyday lives. Too many jokes are made about ourselves. I find myself making jokes all the time about myself. It's always good to have modesty and to be humble. Life is short and we shouldn't take things too seriously, including ourselves. It's a beautiful trait to have to be able to take things in stride and not get down on yourself or sweat the small stuff, but sometimes we take it to extreme. I watch YouTube videos, and some of the most popular ones are when the YouTuber is making jokes about themselves, like, "I'm a piece of shit person" and other things along those lines-- you know what I'm talking about. I'm sure you may be thinking, "They are just kidding around, don't take it so seriously", but it got me thinking, we don't take it seriously enough. You say something enough times and you begin to think it's true. I catch myself calling myself chunky, or reminding people I'm 23 as if it is a bad thing- when it's so not! So I wanted to make a list of 3 questions for me to ask myself: 1. What are 5 things I love about myself? 2. What have I learned from my biggest mistake? 3. What compliment do most people give to me? Do I agree? Why? I know the last one is really three, but it's therapeutic to try to look at yourself in the best light. I personally try so hard to be "self-aware" , and I have found that 90% of the time I am pointing out my flaws and trying to correct them- not seeing the qualities I bring to the table. Or I look at by "bad qualities" and don't ever look at the positive things that those qualities bring. Example: I am very ridged in my schedule and don't take spur of the moment things wonderfully- some may see that as not having the ability to be flexible. I could say to those people that I am able to keep a schedule and no one would ever have to worry about me getting the things done that I need to that day. It's really a good quality to have in the work place. hah I challenge you to ask yourself those questions- or whatever questions you can think of that make you have to be nice to yourself. It's okay to know your positive qualities and take a moment to admire yourself. Those are my thoughts for today! Talk to you next time! |
Blog 5.16.28
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This is what I am going through right now and & I thought you should know. Lets own our own truth and stop hiding behind the hashtag #livingmybestlife.
Thank you all for your kind words and support! |
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Blog 5.15.18
Yeah your not seeing doubles! DOUBLE POST TODAY BAM! Sorry, that was waayy too excited typing for a blog post. But my life is little... like me.
I've posted three, yeah count em, three videos. So I wanted to type a lil somthin' somthin' up for your reading pleasure this afternoon! *Really it's that I am having an "ugly day" and don't want to show my face
I saw a prompt on Pinterest-yes the one app all women can get sucked into for hours and plan their dream wedding & baby shower all before lunch time- and I thought I'd try that out as opposed to my usual rambling.
1. Full Name: Harley Lauren Murphy - fun fact growing up I consistently spelled my middle name "Loran"- probably the only thing I was consistent in.
2. Zodiac sign: Sagata.... however you spell it... the horse man
3. 3 Fears: The dark, being alone in the dark, and jellyfish.
4. 3 things I love: Stephen, Kitta, and Cheese Wiz... just kidding Stella- though I do love Cheese Wiz
5.My best friend: is non existent
6. Last song I listened to: Peach Scone by Hobo Johnson
7. 4 turn on's: uhh, the light switch turns on, and I have a few of those in my house.
8. turn off's: I can turn those lights off too
9. How many tattoos do I have: three
10. The reason I joined Youtube: to upload videos to here, but I may make a full switch- we shall see
11. How I feel right now: Lethargic
12. Something I really want: another glass of wine
13. My current relationship status: did you see my last video?
14. Meaning behind my URL: It's my everyday life and I am honest to a fault... so I swear to remain unfiltered *except on Instagram*
15. My relationship with my parents: still waiting on that paternity test.
16. My favorite holiday: Groundhog Day is nice
17. One thing I've lied about: the amount I spent at TJMaxx- but that's a regular thing, so is it really a lie now or an expectation?
18. An embarrassing moment: literally everyday when someone asks me the time.... and there is only an analog clock around
19.Something I am talented at: denial
20. My idea of a perfect date: pizza on the beach
21. My celeb crush(s): Steve Harvy, Steven Tyler, & Ruby Rose
22. Do I smoke or drink: No & Yes
23. Favorite book: Great Gatsby
1 question for each year I have been alive. There was actually 50 on the prompt but I didn't like all of the questions and this is my life and I'll do as I please dammit. It's like the Tootsie Pop Commercial... the world may never knowwwww.
bonus: my favorite thing is when im driving and look over at another car & unexpectedly see a dog.
I've posted three, yeah count em, three videos. So I wanted to type a lil somthin' somthin' up for your reading pleasure this afternoon! *Really it's that I am having an "ugly day" and don't want to show my face
I saw a prompt on Pinterest-yes the one app all women can get sucked into for hours and plan their dream wedding & baby shower all before lunch time- and I thought I'd try that out as opposed to my usual rambling.
1. Full Name: Harley Lauren Murphy - fun fact growing up I consistently spelled my middle name "Loran"- probably the only thing I was consistent in.
2. Zodiac sign: Sagata.... however you spell it... the horse man
3. 3 Fears: The dark, being alone in the dark, and jellyfish.
4. 3 things I love: Stephen, Kitta, and Cheese Wiz... just kidding Stella- though I do love Cheese Wiz
5.My best friend: is non existent
6. Last song I listened to: Peach Scone by Hobo Johnson
7. 4 turn on's: uhh, the light switch turns on, and I have a few of those in my house.
8. turn off's: I can turn those lights off too
9. How many tattoos do I have: three
10. The reason I joined Youtube: to upload videos to here, but I may make a full switch- we shall see
11. How I feel right now: Lethargic
12. Something I really want: another glass of wine
13. My current relationship status: did you see my last video?
14. Meaning behind my URL: It's my everyday life and I am honest to a fault... so I swear to remain unfiltered *except on Instagram*
15. My relationship with my parents: still waiting on that paternity test.
16. My favorite holiday: Groundhog Day is nice
17. One thing I've lied about: the amount I spent at TJMaxx- but that's a regular thing, so is it really a lie now or an expectation?
18. An embarrassing moment: literally everyday when someone asks me the time.... and there is only an analog clock around
19.Something I am talented at: denial
20. My idea of a perfect date: pizza on the beach
21. My celeb crush(s): Steve Harvy, Steven Tyler, & Ruby Rose
22. Do I smoke or drink: No & Yes
23. Favorite book: Great Gatsby
1 question for each year I have been alive. There was actually 50 on the prompt but I didn't like all of the questions and this is my life and I'll do as I please dammit. It's like the Tootsie Pop Commercial... the world may never knowwwww.
bonus: my favorite thing is when im driving and look over at another car & unexpectedly see a dog.
Blog 5.15.18
In celebration of Monica & Chandler's 17th wedding anniversary, here is a photo from my wedding almost 3 years ago!!
Blog 5.14.18Why is it that it is now "normal" for a man to text/ DM/ Snapchat a married woman under the guise that he is "just being a friend" & hit on her? Does no one our age respect marriage? I need answers! How would you feel if your wife was getting messages asking if she is still in a relationship?
Do you do it because if she rejects you- it's because shes married- because it couldn't be that you are unappealing! Here are my thoughts ... |
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Blog 5.10.18
I try to go for a "Beach-y/Farmhouse" feel in our home.
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Blog 5.7.18My Summertime Salad: - 15 oz Can of Black Beans - 15 oz Can of Diced Tomatoes - 15 oz Can of Corn - 15 oz Can of Chickpeas/ Garbanzo Beans - 1 Avocado - 1/2 Diced Red Onion - Green Chilies - 1 Diced Bell Pepper (I use the mixed bag from Wal-Mart *work smarter not harder*) -Lime Juice, salt, and pepper, to taste |
Blog 5.6.18
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Blog 5.5.18
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I know that I have talked about my feelings about my fertility issues in the past, but I wanted to take a moment this afternoon and talk about a few things that you probably should avoid saying to someone dealing with this.
I know you mean well- and you are coming from a place of love, but these are a couple of the things that I am over hearing! I'm sure that there are others out there who feel the same too! Thanks for coming back for more of my unfiltered everyday- it's a mess, I know! HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!!!! |
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Blog 5.3.18
How I got into real estate & the most common questions I get asked.
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Blog 5.2.18After last night's blog I immediately knew what I wanted to write about tonight. I wanted to talk about Authenticity. I had a hard time growing up being my true self. I wanted to fit in; like everyone does. I stayed quiet most of the time and agreed with everyone else. It wasn't until I was in my late teens and out of high school that I started being me.
Being authentic is one of the most important things that you can do these days. Be your truest self, because it's tiring putting on a front. We spend so much time "living our best life" on Instagram, it makes you wonder whats real. Look some nights I forget to take my birth control and I dont feel like pouring a glass of water to take it so I grab the open bottle of wine out of the fridge and take it with that. We all have things that we don't blast all over the internet for everyone to see. I'm not saying you should do that either. What I am saying is just be yourself. With that though doesn't mean that you get away with being a shit person because "that's just you". You don't get to be rude to someone and just say "oh, I'm just really honest", no you are mean. Be your most excellent self. I need to work on not cussing so much. It's doesn't portray myself in the best light. I want to always put my best foot forward. Firs impressions, are important. Some say they are everything. You can't judge a book by its cover, but the cover does say a lot. First impressions leave a big impact, but they aren't forever either. What do you think the first impression is that you leave on most? Is it what you want it to be? We all want to be liked, that doesn't mean that we need to be door mats, but no one really WANTS to be disliked. All I'm saying is be your best self, and be proud of what you are about. There is only one you, out of all the billions of people not one person has the same thumb print as you.... whats even crazier is that both of your thumbs have different prints. You are the only you that will ever be. So be the you-est you there is. |
Blog 5.1.18Tonight I want to talk about confidence. Today I was lucky enough to be in a class listening to a woman speak on etiquette and business & I heard a phrase that spoke to me. "Gravitas", which means, "Grace on Fire". That right there is confidence. To me, it isn't about being the best at something. It's knowing that I am able to not look at myself and make sure I am correct, but able to engage with everyone else. 2018 is the year of being self aware for me. Too many people my age spend more time deflecting than bettering themselves. I want to work on taking ownership of my flaws as well as gracefully accepting accomplishments. I want to learn to show more empathy & allow myself to be emotional.
In this world humans need one thing aside from food, water, and shelter, and that is to feel important. If I am able to detach myself from what I am doing and I am able to focus on the interaction taking place in front of me- then for that moment I am making someone else feel important. If I can make that happen then I stand a greater chance at forming a relationship with that person. My goal is to obtain "Grace on Fire". I want to hold myself accountable to the highest standard that I don't have any other option but to succeed. It's not a resolution, because humans cannot make a drastic change like that- it's more of a teaching moment within myself. Being excellent isn't being 1,000% better at something, its being 1% better than I was yesterday. I cannot give what I don't have. If I am not confident in what I am doing or saying, how am I able to instill confidence in my peers, my family, or my kids? Simply put; I can't. We are all good at something. We all have that one thing that gets us excited to do- why? because we are good at it. Be confident in what you are doing and strive to do better, because you what to claim to be the best, then you damn sure better be the best! Walking into that room today, I didn't have any real plans of taking something away from it, but I did. I was there for a reason, because what she said clicked like nothing else in my life ever has. I needed to be in that space with her and hearing what she had to say. I challenge us to all be more self aware. |
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Blog 4.29.18
We had a wonderful weekend relaxing, planting, and spending time with the girls. It isn't often that we are both free for the whole weekend.
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I want to keep it shot today- we spend so much of our time showing our best lives on Social Media, lets not forget to be in the moment with the ones we are with. Be present, and be appreciative. You have a beautiful life, don't forget to enjoy it, not just post it.
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I want to keep it shot today- we spend so much of our time showing our best lives on Social Media, lets not forget to be in the moment with the ones we are with. Be present, and be appreciative. You have a beautiful life, don't forget to enjoy it, not just post it.
Blog 4.25.18
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If I'm so smart, why aren't I a success yet?
If your childhood was anything like mine, you grew up with your parents telling you that you were going to be something one day. What that something was, I'm sure they had no idea, but something nonetheless. I always made good grades growing up, I wasn't the Straight A Type, but A's & B's were the norm. But why aren't I a success yet? I listened to what my teachers told me in school; go to college and you'll get a good job. Well, I went to college... not a university because I foot the bill on my own and couldn't afford it. But college is college... right? Wrong. See, my problem was that I was so hung up on going to some 4 year university and had this idea of what "success" was. Which was a 9-5 Monday through Friday gig; making more than 70k a year. I didn't care if I was happy there, as long as the job matched those criteria. But success isn't measured in the amount of money you make. It's all subjective. You don't have to work at a hospital to be a "big deal", or work for an attorney either. Do you enjoy what you do? Great! Then that's a success. I think that a "success" isn't an end all be all, but more of a check list. Everyone's check list is different. Mine sums up to: am I happy?, was I excited to go to work?, did I make a positive impact for someone else?, did I contribute? I think when those things happen they are little success stories. All of them. Everyday is a new day to be a success. I went to college and my career isn't anywhere close to what I went to school for. Is that a failure, I don't think so. It took me 2 years after college to figure out what I was good at, and what made me happy. There is nothing wrong with switching majors, or jumping careers. We live this life to work, why not enjoy what you do? With all of that being said, I feel very strongly that if you are wanting to be a pillar in your particular field, or office. Learn to pay your fricken' dues!! Oh, my gosh! Too many young adults like myself I see wanting immediate gratification in their job. They want that private office, or that promotion, but aren't willing to be a runner and make copies for their first 6 months. We have a sense of entitlement about our generation that confuses me. Most of us were raised by blue collar workers, and yet we see ourselves as above that. My husband comes home everyday covered in grease and literally has a BLUE COLLAR, but guess what guys, he makes more than double what I make. Everyone's success story is different, own yours. Be proud of what you do, even if right now you have a part time job while you have school or life going on- own it! If this isn't the end of the road for you, don't be ashamed to tell people, "Yeah I work at McDonald's while I'm finishing up my BA" you are a success in your own right! |
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Blog 4.21.18Are you allowed to be friends with a friend's ex?
I had a situation happen some time ago and I wanted to talk about it. I am going to change names in order to keep these peoples' lives private & "try" not to piss anyone off. ***This post's point is not about the friendship- it's about the the things leading up to this*** So I had this friend- lets call her Tina. Now, Tina and I hadn't been friends long. We met back in October of 2017. She and I hit it off fairly quick, but we weren't what you would call "best friends". We hung out most weekends for about a month and a half and got super close, but the friendship didn't have any real substance. We just went out to the bar and drank and went on double dates. I mean don't get me wrong, this girl is cool as shit! But she has a best friend already and I was cool with knowing that we were never going to be super close. Tina had a boyfriend- lets call him Conner. I had never met Conner until Tina. We didn't have any mutual friends or anything like that. I only knew him through Tina. So like I said earlier- Tina and I would double date often. Well my husband and Conner hit it off. They became friends pretty fast and it was nice to see my husband make a new friend. And I thought Conner was pretty cool too. Fast forward a few months later and Tina and Conner broke up. Now I wont go into detail of what happened, but we all know the saying; "There is 3 sides to every story- his, hers, and the truth". I just stayed out of it because at that point I was friends with both of them and I really didn't want to be mean to either of them. I stayed friends with Tina for maybe another month... One night Conner ended up hanging out with us. Tina and myself were drunk this night and got into a disagreement about a pretty touchy subject (to me). I didn't think anything of it the next day, because we were both drunk and it was small. If anyone should have been upset however it should have been me, because like I said- this was a crazy touchy subject that she brought up *in MY house I might add* & I tried to end the conversation plenty of times but she kept going. I am not saying however that she isn't entitled to her feelings- because she is! Next few weeks go by and I don't really hear from her- I text her a few times but it's like pulling teeth to get her to respond. Then one day I see her (won't say how- because I don't want anyone knowing who this is) and she made a pretty snarky comment that I'm sure she didn't think I heard... but hey, I did. I get that fights can be awkward after the fact- but I didn't know that there was a problem- she wouldn't communicate. I am 23 years old, married, and living a fricken adult life; I don't have time for pettiness on that level. If she had just been honest and was like, "hey you pissed me off", I would have been more than happy to talk about it and work it out. I can't fix what I don't know! But unfortunately that's not what happened. Again, this girl is awesome! She means well, she is kind, and thoughtful. Just an all around good person- it just didn't work out for us to be close any more. I think people are in our lives for a reason. I think we did something for one another & once that was fulfilled, life changed the game. So back to the ex. He and my husband were friends & honestly Stephen missed hanging out with this guy. So, is it so wrong to want to be friends with this ex of an ex friend? I don't want to do it out of malice; it's more so because we all got along so well. I don't know. |
Since my last update on our journey with pregnancy/ adoption/ Endo, I have gotten so many questions. Some are the standard, and some catch me off guard!
I would love to make a post or video answering any and all questions some of you may have. So click the button below & you'll be directed to the contact page- ask me whatever you want!
Ask Stephen whatever you want. I said from the beginning that I wanted to be 110% honest about everything I post. I know some of you have questions , but you aren't sure how to ask,
so I wanted to open the floor this way!
I would love to make a post or video answering any and all questions some of you may have. So click the button below & you'll be directed to the contact page- ask me whatever you want!
Ask Stephen whatever you want. I said from the beginning that I wanted to be 110% honest about everything I post. I know some of you have questions , but you aren't sure how to ask,
so I wanted to open the floor this way!
Blog 4.18.18Hi there ! My name is Stella and I am almost 4 years old. I was adopted around Christmas time for my mom, but my dad is my favorite! He gives me more treats than he tells mom, but lets keep that between us! He also doesn't mind all my fat rolls.
I was really little when I first came home, I had my first bath in the sink at our old house. We have a new house now- it has a dog park!! Daddy calls me the most expensive free dog ever. But that's probably because I had an accident when I was really little where I got my tail caught in the sliding glass door and part of it came off. Good thing the puppy doctor was right down the road so that they could stitch it right up, I had to wear a cone for a few weeks which I ended up chewing to bits, so that was the only fun part. Theeeennnn, about a year later I wacked my tail on the wall, or chair, or deck railing, or really anything (I was always hitting my tail on stuff) & it broke the end again. So I had to have the WHOLE THING chopped off... it was a sad day. But now I have a nubbie, and its a nice nubbie. I have a cow lick on the end of it that mommy has to cut so the other dogs don't make fun of me. I have a big sister who cleans me all the time. It's loud, but it's okay & I make a funny face when I get in trouble; I squeeze my eyes together so tight because if I can't see you, then you cant see me, and I smile real big to remind mommy and daddy just how cute I am! I ran away once with my big sister. We just went a few streets over but it took a long time to find us. All we wanted to do was go to the pond, but we got lost on the way! My days consist of chewing on my Kong Bone while trying to get my sister to play with me. She is older so shes not as playful as I am so I usually whine until daddy comes outside to play. He'll take off my zappy collar and we will walk to the lake, which is in our backyard, but its still a treat for me! I love the water, but I hate the water from the inside! I don't like little dogs so we only go to the dog park in the evenings... small dog babies just look like toys to me and it scares me when they make noise. I like when we go Lowes together as a family- that's my favorite thing to do, but only if we take dad's car... I have to ride in the waaaay back in mom's and I don't like that. My favorite snack is cheese. That's about it for me, mom just wanted me to introduce myself! |
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Blog 4.17.18
I wanted to update you guys on how things are going for us in Babyville. I have my surgery scheduled for the end of July-30 some odd days after we get back from Mexico. At that point we should have most of our questions answered; like, can we get pregnant, and if so am I able to carry full term.
As I said in my last post about all of this we have decided that adoption will be the way we go should we be unable to make or carry a baby. We have also decided that even if we are told that we can get pregnant but it would be a hard pregnancy, that we will more than likely adopt. We originally thought to adopt internationally because we heard it was much cheaper. That's false.
So for anyone looking to adopt here are some things you may want to know (disclaimer, we are still learning ourselves, this is just what I have found out thus far)
1. Its just as expensive to adopt internationally as it is domestically
2. There are unexpected costs with both. Example: visas, visiting country of origin pre birth, rent for birth mother, surprise medical issues, etc
3. It seems to be easier to adopt through an agency
4. It costs anywhere between 25,000 & 50,000 to adopt
5. There is such a thing as a loan specifically for adoption
6. Its not just someone picking you out of a group of other prospective parents- there's home studies, counseling, submitting financial information and interviews.
With all of that being said, Stephen and I are staying positive, but realistic. We would love to be able to have a child naturally, but we know that this is a rout we will more than likely take. We will still do all of the exciting things that come with pregnancy, like a huge announcment, baby shower, and gender party! We are both excited and nervous all at the same time.
Be on the look out for our next update, it may very well be aboit our first Home Study!
As I said in my last post about all of this we have decided that adoption will be the way we go should we be unable to make or carry a baby. We have also decided that even if we are told that we can get pregnant but it would be a hard pregnancy, that we will more than likely adopt. We originally thought to adopt internationally because we heard it was much cheaper. That's false.
So for anyone looking to adopt here are some things you may want to know (disclaimer, we are still learning ourselves, this is just what I have found out thus far)
1. Its just as expensive to adopt internationally as it is domestically
2. There are unexpected costs with both. Example: visas, visiting country of origin pre birth, rent for birth mother, surprise medical issues, etc
3. It seems to be easier to adopt through an agency
4. It costs anywhere between 25,000 & 50,000 to adopt
5. There is such a thing as a loan specifically for adoption
6. Its not just someone picking you out of a group of other prospective parents- there's home studies, counseling, submitting financial information and interviews.
With all of that being said, Stephen and I are staying positive, but realistic. We would love to be able to have a child naturally, but we know that this is a rout we will more than likely take. We will still do all of the exciting things that come with pregnancy, like a huge announcment, baby shower, and gender party! We are both excited and nervous all at the same time.
Be on the look out for our next update, it may very well be aboit our first Home Study!
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Blog 4.13.18If you came here from Instagram or Facebook you already know what I am about to talk about. If not, well, I your about to find out.
I didn't wear a bra today. For some of you ladies, that's no big deal. You are comfortable enough to wear those cute little tank tops or dresses that no matter what devil magic you have you just can't seem to hide your bra... so you go bra-less. Me, not so much. I am a 32DD, I am very small in stature (5'0) and all around a small human in general. This all started last week, I was at TJMaxx (sigh.. of course) & I was on the hunt for a Maxi Dress to wear now that it's warming up. What I found was this super cute yellow, floraley, strappy number & I fell in love. I tried it on and no matte which way I tried to stuff my bra (uncomfortably I might add) I couldn't hide it. But I friggen' loved that damn dress. So what did I do? Bought it. Duhh! I got it home and it sat in my closet taunting me for a few days and today was finally the day; I had taken today off for the most part because my Memaw (mom's mom) was finishing her Chemo today & I was going to wear that damn dress. It was nice and sunny and warm today. That was it I made my mind up. Until I got in front of the mirror. Let me tell you it was nerve wracking. I was so self conscious. I didn't want anyone to be able to tell that I didn't have one on. I was nervous that my nipples would show. Or that my boobs weren't perky enough to "get away" with going without a bra. I feel like there is a level of comfort a bra gives me even though they are uncomfortable as hell! But its a barrier between me and my insecurities. With a bra, my boobs look great, without I feel that they are just kind of blah. So I am challenging myself to buy more things that I can't wear a bra with and IMMEDIATELY take the tags off so I can't return it and go bra-less. I will tell you as the day went on I forgot that I didn't have one on, until it was time to change into my P.J's and it was one less article of clothing to take of. I was like "Oh! Hey there girls!" I wish I was more confident when it came to fashion to that extent. I want to get to a point where I can put anything on and love myself in it and feel great. So you may hear more about this little challenge I've given myself over the next few months as I make myself face this head on. |
Blog 4.7.18Part two of three in the Fortune Cookie Series: If you don't do it excellently, don't do it at all.
Why do anything half-assed? I mean it's a simple question to which most would answer "well I don't do anything half-assed". In theory- sure. But often I've found in myself that I get half way through something I don't particularly want to do, and at that point I just call it quits. Liiiikeee... laundry. I am a HUGE procrastinator with laundry! I find myself washing, flipping, and folding one load, and starting a new one- I'll get another load started and quit. Like literally "forget" to flip the laundry & we all know how that ends! I often do a lot of things half-assed. It's not that I mean to, but shit happens, or doesn't happen really. I think that we try to put on the best versions of ourselves online. But I have definitely cleaned up whatever area was going to be in the back ground of whatever picture I was taking & nothing else. If we can't do the simple things- how can we hold ourselves accountable to do the really big things? Answer: we can't. But! It's about drive, and how important that "one thing" is to you. I get that those are more simple examples but on a more serious note: We all get tired, we all have things come up that get in the way. But if we have something going on that is important- do it all the way. Or else why do it? If I can't 100% put all of my time, energy, and effort into completing what I want to do & I can't see myself going above and beyond to have it done the right way... then I have no business doing it to begin with. Things like college and marriage are often put on the back burner of life. "Oh... I have that paper due, but I have family in town" "We should go out on a date; it's been months... but I'm tired and just want to go to sleep". These are things that have actually come out of my mouth. Life is hard- but it's such a gratifying feeling to do something and be proud of it. Now, marriage is always a work in progress, but you can still be proud of the work that you and your partner put in. I refuse to go to bed or leave the house without telling Stephen that I love him, even when I'm super pissed. It's something so small, but its putting in an effort. I know I kind of rambled with this one, but I had so many thoughts about doing things all the way vs. half way & tried to touch on all of them. |
***I can't tell you how many times I went to type "how" and typed "hoe". Praise Jebus for Auto-Correct!***
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Blog 4.6.18This is part one of a short three part fortune cookie series I want to do. I got the idea while my mom was in town last week, we went to Formosa right off of College Park Rd and of course we couldn't leave without fortune cookies.
Fortune #1: If the cake is bad, what good is the frosting. So I took this to mean a few things. My first thought was if a person is no good, what is the point of speaking highly of them? Why cover for their mistakes and lies if at their core they are a mean person. This was probably the first though for me because it's a situation that has unfortunately fallen into my lap as of late. Finding that someone close to you who you thought highly of, is not as great of a human as you wanted them to be. Not to say that just because someone makes a mistake that they are instantly a bad human. But if the pattern of behavior makes them such, then you are not the one at fault for seeing them for what they really are. It's an unsavory state of affairs when you find that someone you love and admire is not who you thought they were. But that is a fact of life, and without people like that- we can't grow. I also thought of work ethic. So often I find that people make themselves out to be more than what they really are. I will be honest- I am just getting started in my career, I am at the bottom of the food chain. With that being said I am with one of the top teams in the Tri-County area, so I can't be doing too bad. But there are times where I see someone try to make out how much/hard they work, and really its not true. I've seen someone make themselves sound so much more important in their job than what they really are. You should always have pride in what you do. No matter what. But also be honest, just because this is where you are now, doesn't mean this is your destination. You have so much room to grow. Lastly, I thought of myself. If at my core the cake is no good, what really IS the point in frosting? At the end of the day, I need to make sure I am taken care of. Not just food in my belly and shoes on my feet, but my well-being...Me. What good does the smile, the make up, the clothes, the one liners do if I'm not up to par. It got me thinking of all the other moms, and wifes out there who have so much more on their plate than I. I'm not a mom, nor will I try to pretend to be one, but if there is one thing I do know, it's that we all need time. We all need a moment to breath and check in on ourselves. You aren't selfish for having a glass of wine with dinner, you aren't selfish for hitting that snooze button every now and then. Everyone needs something. So take that something- whatever it may be and do it! Write, take up photography, draw, cuss a little (it always makes me feel better). Do what makes your insides warm and fuzzy. Because it's those things that we need as humans that make you... you. |
Blog 4.1.18
Well, Happy Easter! I thought today was better than any other day to talk about this. I may get some flack, hell, I may have some of you stop following me. But this proves to be another time to point out that this is my space & my thoughts. I want to talk about my relationship with religion. Touchy subject I know!
If you remember from my list of facts about me, I said that religion confuses me, and that is true; in part. But there is so much more. Religion isn't something that I rely on like many. It is something that exists within this world along side of me like the trees and animals, like you. It's just there, and so am I.
Religion is beautiful to me; the way it brings people together in one place from all across the world for the same reason. I'm not a religious person, but I do appreciate it and have respect for it as an entity. You might be wondering why, or you very well may not be that invested at this point. But I'll explain anyway. I grew up with the ability to choose. I decided if I wanted to go to church or not. During the Summer, I went to stay with my grandparents on my mom's side and they went to church most every Sunday- so I did too. But when Summer was over, so was church. Not that my parents wouldn't have taken me upon my request, there just wasn't one.
I have a very difficult time with the "story line" for lack of a better phrase that the Bible portrays. It's hard for me to wrap my head around the idea of a man being killed and coming back 3 days later, when I'm told that as a Christian you don't believe in ghosts. I know, I know, he wasn't a ghost- he was Jesus. He was alive. But if your friend died and you claimed that they came back from the dead a few days later, you would be thought to be crazy and no one would believe you. I do understand that he is a special person because he was... is God's son, but it doesn't negate the fact that it's a little super natural. *Insert Dean and Sam joke that I am too lazy to think of right now*
So this is usually the point where my family tells me that it takes "Faith". Yes, the clincher to all religion based discussions. Faith. I am allowed to not 100% be on board with Religion. It doesn't mean someone needs to "help" me, or prove me to be incorrect. I admire those who have the ability to faithfully believe. I welcome the idea of being wrong. I don't feel the need to be right about God or Jesus. I am open to hearing any and all sides to this discussion. Unfortunately however, 9 times out of 10- it is never a discussion. It's an argument, and that ladies and gentlemen is where I stop listening.
I am not sure if there is a "higher being" so to speak, but what I do believe in is Karma. I feel that you should walk this earth doing the right & kind thing. I feel that what you do here matters. It may not translate into an after-life in my mind, but like I said earlier; I welcome the idea of being wrong, and that doesn't mean that there isn't an after life for you. I believe in peace and balance. I feel that for every action there is a consequence. It may not be immediate, but it'll come.
Now that the idea of children is on the horizon for myself and my husband, the question of wheather we will join a church has come up. And the answer is simply put; No. I want my child to be educated in all religion. Not just Christianity. If they want to study Buddhism, go to Hebrew School, or decide that they do want to attend church every Sunday, that's fine. It's okay. If they decide that they are unsure of God as I am, I will not stifle their questions and if I don't have the answer, then we will find out. I want to create an environment for my child to be an open-minded self thinker.
I want to make sure that I drive this last point home. I by no means think that those who are religious are not open minded or self thinkers. I think the exact opposite. You made the decision to get up and serve your Lord. I have nothing but positive things to say and think of those of you who are on the other end of the spectrum than I. It's all about acceptance and balance.
If you remember from my list of facts about me, I said that religion confuses me, and that is true; in part. But there is so much more. Religion isn't something that I rely on like many. It is something that exists within this world along side of me like the trees and animals, like you. It's just there, and so am I.
Religion is beautiful to me; the way it brings people together in one place from all across the world for the same reason. I'm not a religious person, but I do appreciate it and have respect for it as an entity. You might be wondering why, or you very well may not be that invested at this point. But I'll explain anyway. I grew up with the ability to choose. I decided if I wanted to go to church or not. During the Summer, I went to stay with my grandparents on my mom's side and they went to church most every Sunday- so I did too. But when Summer was over, so was church. Not that my parents wouldn't have taken me upon my request, there just wasn't one.
I have a very difficult time with the "story line" for lack of a better phrase that the Bible portrays. It's hard for me to wrap my head around the idea of a man being killed and coming back 3 days later, when I'm told that as a Christian you don't believe in ghosts. I know, I know, he wasn't a ghost- he was Jesus. He was alive. But if your friend died and you claimed that they came back from the dead a few days later, you would be thought to be crazy and no one would believe you. I do understand that he is a special person because he was... is God's son, but it doesn't negate the fact that it's a little super natural. *Insert Dean and Sam joke that I am too lazy to think of right now*
So this is usually the point where my family tells me that it takes "Faith". Yes, the clincher to all religion based discussions. Faith. I am allowed to not 100% be on board with Religion. It doesn't mean someone needs to "help" me, or prove me to be incorrect. I admire those who have the ability to faithfully believe. I welcome the idea of being wrong. I don't feel the need to be right about God or Jesus. I am open to hearing any and all sides to this discussion. Unfortunately however, 9 times out of 10- it is never a discussion. It's an argument, and that ladies and gentlemen is where I stop listening.
I am not sure if there is a "higher being" so to speak, but what I do believe in is Karma. I feel that you should walk this earth doing the right & kind thing. I feel that what you do here matters. It may not translate into an after-life in my mind, but like I said earlier; I welcome the idea of being wrong, and that doesn't mean that there isn't an after life for you. I believe in peace and balance. I feel that for every action there is a consequence. It may not be immediate, but it'll come.
Now that the idea of children is on the horizon for myself and my husband, the question of wheather we will join a church has come up. And the answer is simply put; No. I want my child to be educated in all religion. Not just Christianity. If they want to study Buddhism, go to Hebrew School, or decide that they do want to attend church every Sunday, that's fine. It's okay. If they decide that they are unsure of God as I am, I will not stifle their questions and if I don't have the answer, then we will find out. I want to create an environment for my child to be an open-minded self thinker.
I want to make sure that I drive this last point home. I by no means think that those who are religious are not open minded or self thinkers. I think the exact opposite. You made the decision to get up and serve your Lord. I have nothing but positive things to say and think of those of you who are on the other end of the spectrum than I. It's all about acceptance and balance.
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Blog 3.31.18I'm not a Feminist. Yup, you read that right. I'm not a feminist. Not in any way, shape, or form. Period.
I bet some of you are surprised to hear that. Well, those of you who have spent any time around me that is. But it's true. I'm not. Now, that's not to say I am not all about women empowerment! I am 110% behind that! I think if you can do the same job as a man, then you should be paid accordingly. I think that no means no, and it's disgusting that men still think its appropriate to cat- call you while walking into the gas station at 6am on your way to work. It blows my mind that for the most part, the expectation is still there for the woman to cook and clean the house while still working full time. You have to watch what you wear so you don't open the floor for derogatory comments to be made. When a woman sleeps around- shes a whore, when a man does it- its just a topic of conversation. When a woman goes out to a bar- she will more than likely be hit on multiple times by some guy who inevitably gets turned down and then shes a bitch. When a guy gets hit on... well that's a different story. But humor me for a moment and think if what a feminist is today. No, not what it is really meant to be, but what it is as of right now; at 12:14pm on March 31st, 2018. When the feminist movement started it was about women empowerment- because lets be honest, we needed empowering. At that point women were dishwashers & baby-makers. Not doctors or lawyers. Women were the lesser species. Men were at the top of the food chain. Women did what they were told to do when they were told to do it. Today- a "feminist" is simply a man-hater. It makes me so sad to see what such a wonderful movement has turned into. Blaming men for everything wrong. Spewing words of hate and filth just because you can because you have a vagina. A real woman to admire is one who doesn't blame a man for not getting the promotion, but pulls herself up by her boot straps and gets shit done to prove them they made the wrong choice. I will never blame men for what isn't right in my life or in the lives of others. Its up to you to make the change we want to see in the rest of the world. Don't bitch and carry on, or walk down the street protesting topless because you feel that it should be your right to walk around with your breasts out. Get shit done. Get up and go to work and be a boss! Feminism shouldn't be about making yourself "better" than a man. It's about showing your equality. The women who started it- do you think that they would be proud of whats going on today? I feel it's safe to assume no. I really could go on and on about this, but my last few posts have been lengthy. So I'll end it here- in order to be respected by others- we first have to respect ourselves and each other. I see day in and day out other women taring each other down. Why? If we cannot stand together and support each other, then we are doomed. So stop slut-shaming, mom-bashing, and all around damning other women for living their lives differently than you live yours. Just because it's not what you would do, doesn't make it wrong. |
Blog 3.29.18My biological dad didn't come to my wedding. It's kind of a long story, but I'll see if I can condense it down to the the main point and not beat around the bush too much.
So I got married September 26th, 2015. Best. Day. Ever. Ten out of ten, totally recommend! I walked myself down the isle- because I can do bad all by myself. My parents separated maybe right at or right under a year before I got married. Between that and the time I got married my mom had started seeing my now stepdad. I didn't have the best relationship with my bio-dad at that time either. It wasn't healthy for me to communicate or be around him at that point. He wasn't in a good place. Still isn't. But as nervous as it made me feel, I did what I was supposed to do and sent him a Save The Date and a Formal Invitation. The Formal Invite came probably 3ish months before the actual wedding date; long enough to get a response. I waited and waited, but nothing. So, about a month out I texted him (yes, I could have called, but like I said- not in a good place). I told him I needed to know within a week if he was going to show up because I needed to tell the caterers how many guests we would have (true fact). He didn't respond to my text. So, I called- no answer. Another week goes by and I texted him again saying that I was taking his lack of response as a "no" that he wouldn't be attending the wedding. He of course responded to that as it had gotten his attention. But it was too late at that point. I wasn't going to play games & feed into his bullshit. *side note- this behavior was typical of him* His reason was simply because my mom's boyfriend was going to be there. He had told my mom, my grandparents, and had mentioned it to my younger sister. So, he didn't show. And you wanna know something? My wedding was still amazing! The man who my mom would marry a year later not only showed up, but helped set up, made sure I had the extra AF Chocolate (yes I said chocolate) Photo booth that I just had to have. And made sure to dance with me. That is a real dad. Someone who shows up. Did I feel let down that he let his personal issues get in the way of showing up to the most important day of my life? Hell yes! But now, it doesn't bother me- honestly. It is what it is- those who love you and want the best for you will show up. Not just at your wedding, but in life. Those who have your best interest at heart- will show up. You won't even have to ask. As ladies, it is assumed by others that we "need" someone to walk us down the isle and give us away. But I own my shit, and I am my own person to "give away". You can be independent even on your wedding day. You do you, and to hell with the rest that can't accept that. |
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Blog 3.28.18I wish making friends worked like a job interview. You answer a few questions, fill out a form or two and if you are a good fit- you are friends.
I don't have a best friend, I want one, but it seems like everyone else has a best friend or an impenetrable friend group. As crazy as it sounds, when I see those groups post all their pictures on Instagram it makes me a little jealous. I would love to have a group of girls that we hang out most weekends, go out on the boat, or just hang out at the house and have a glass of wine and chill. Friends are hard to come by and harder to keep, we don't invest enough time in each other and we let silly fights end friendships. I can't tell you how many times I've had a stupid argument with a friend and then both of us are too embarrassed to just get over it, so we avoid each other for weeks on end until we awkwardly run into each other one day and don't make eye contact. It's ridiculous. If your friends, your friends. Period. We (ladies) need to stop being so damn sensitive. Also! Women with babies don't only have to be friends with other mommies, and women without kids don't only have to be friends with other non-mommies! I wish there was a Tinder for friends! So here it is, about as vulnerable as it gets- short and sweet. I am so damn over not having girl friends. So with that being said- if you enjoy long walks on the beach and Red wine lets chat... just kidding; that's my impression of some tinder profile. But seriously, I can't be the only one who wishes friends were easier to make and keep. So if you like pointless trips to TJMaxx, Starbucks dates, spending Saturdays on the lake, and trying new wines based on the label & drinking them out on the deck while talking about life- I want to be your friend. |
Blog 3.27.18
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I wanted to talk about something that is important to me this morning, and that's my tattoos... well tattoos in general.
I have 3, but one is a fairly large cover up. I plan to get more in time, but I always like to sit on an idea of a year or so before committing just to make sure I don't change my mind. But that's just me. Tattoos are a personal thing. It's artwork that shows so much about you. The way you think, what you see as beautiful, all the way down to the way you see the world. Right there on your skin. I love it. Tattoos are an expression. I don't have any tattoos in visible places- but that is because I have a very suit and tie job & unfortunately not everyone shares my opinions on tattoos. Is what it is. My favorite expression I hear is "That isn't going to look as good after 30 years and a baby". Well DUH! I'm not getting this for 53 year old me, I'm getting this for 23 year old me. For the me that feels this way in this moment, at this point in my life. Not for 30 years down the road... I'll have other tattoos for that me. All of my tattoos have a meaning or reason behind getting them. Not to say that everyone should look at getting ink the same way, I'm just telling you about me. I have a Swallow on my left shoulder blade with Joshua 1:9 written beneath it. -- My Papaw passed away when I was in high school and it also happened during a very trying time in my life. I decided on the swallow because it signifies a safe trip home- my Papaw was the type to go to church on Sunday's so even though I am not religious; it felt right to do that as well as have his favorite bible verse added I have a short bit of the song "Summertime" on my left rib cage. --When I was little- like when all kids are little my mom sang to me. That was the song she would sing. It's a bit of my childhood I get to have with me all the time. Lastly I have 2 large flowers that cover what was a Phoenix. The Phoenix was awful! I was embarrassed to get into a bathing suit because I didn't want anyone to see it. This is the only tattoo that I didn't take years to decide on. I just knew I needed it covered- so when I went in for a consult I told the woman who would be doing it that I just wanted her to do what she wanted. Make it pretty- but she had all the freedom to do as she pleased. Tattoos are not for everyone- and it's okay for people to tell you they don't like tattoos, just as it is okay for you to like them. It's all about the person. |
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Blog 3.23.18
Why is there such a negative stigma with Plastic Surgery? Like, I can't be the only one who doesn't think its a big deal. But when I hear of someone getting any work done, everyone seems to be up in arms about it. Like its their business! Maybe I missed the memo on that one. But I don't see it as such a big deal.
First off- It's. None. Of. Your. Business!
Second- Who cares?
Third- See the first point.
If someone has the extra money and that's what they want to do with it, who am I to judge? Who are you to judge? Hell, I get Botox every 3 months because I have wrinkles on my forehead that make me self-conscious. Would someone telling me their unsolicited opinion about how I should love myself the way God made me change my mind? No. I have friggen' speed bumps across my face... it looks like the damn Publix parking lot!!
If you want to change something about yourself, and have the money, & that's something you want to do- then by all means-- please do! It's your life to do with what you want.
It makes me laugh to see some of the people who criticize those who get work and they have tattoos! *I have tattoos- nothing against them* But it's a permanent change to your body, just like new tits would be! So whats the difference? Just mind your own biscuits and life will be gravy.
I'm bringing this up-one because its just what came to mind this morning but I was thinking back on an old friend (who I am not friends with anymore) telling me about a girl that we went to school with getting work done and she was so mean about it. I didn't get it. Who did it effect?! And weather it was true or not, the girl looks good! So whats the big, fat, hairy deal?! I just don't understand why people think they have a right to push their opinions on others. Maybe its my age, or something, but I don't get it.
My point is- if you want to do anything in life- no matter what- if it makes you happy & doesn't hurt others... do it. It's your life... no one elses.
First off- It's. None. Of. Your. Business!
Second- Who cares?
Third- See the first point.
If someone has the extra money and that's what they want to do with it, who am I to judge? Who are you to judge? Hell, I get Botox every 3 months because I have wrinkles on my forehead that make me self-conscious. Would someone telling me their unsolicited opinion about how I should love myself the way God made me change my mind? No. I have friggen' speed bumps across my face... it looks like the damn Publix parking lot!!
If you want to change something about yourself, and have the money, & that's something you want to do- then by all means-- please do! It's your life to do with what you want.
It makes me laugh to see some of the people who criticize those who get work and they have tattoos! *I have tattoos- nothing against them* But it's a permanent change to your body, just like new tits would be! So whats the difference? Just mind your own biscuits and life will be gravy.
I'm bringing this up-one because its just what came to mind this morning but I was thinking back on an old friend (who I am not friends with anymore) telling me about a girl that we went to school with getting work done and she was so mean about it. I didn't get it. Who did it effect?! And weather it was true or not, the girl looks good! So whats the big, fat, hairy deal?! I just don't understand why people think they have a right to push their opinions on others. Maybe its my age, or something, but I don't get it.
My point is- if you want to do anything in life- no matter what- if it makes you happy & doesn't hurt others... do it. It's your life... no one elses.
Blog 3.21.19
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Okay, so it't been a few days since I've gotten on here to talk. I had a plan for what I wanted to write about, but I changed my mind. So, I believe that all people you have in your life are there for a reason. They bring something to the table; weather it be that they make you happy, or they are funny, or they are the people you go to the bar with to get shit-hammered. Everyone you give your time to has a purpose. Or at least that is how I view my circle. I invest in people who invest in me. Now, I don't mean monetarily. I mean with time and energy. If you will take the time to text me just to say that you heard a joke that you thought I'd think was funny- that's putting forth energy to maintain a relationship.
With all of that being said; what I want to talk... or really vent about is toxic people we for some reason keep in our lives. I am a firm believer that it is your prerogative to remove people who don't bring you joy from your life. Even if it is someone you share DNA with. I know that it sounds harsh, but sometimes the ones who bring us down the most are the ones that we love the most. I don't think that your "family" is always blood. "Family" to me are the ones that care the most; the ones that build you up, and love you unconditionally. Just because we come from the same blood line doesn't mean I am obligated to keep you in my life and subject myself to your hatefulness. As humans it is our right to live a happy and healthy life. You don't have to continue to keep toxic people around just because you are related to them. Now, I am by no means saying that just because someone says or does something that upsets you or offends you that you should just wright them off. What I AM saying is that if someone is time and time again showing you how little they value you. By either lying, saying hateful things about you or just making you feel bad about yourself then to hell with them. They don't deserve all that you bring to the table as the amazing human that you are. They don't get to see you grow and prosper. You don't have to live your life with people in it just because at birth they were there. That goes for friends and family alike. It's your life and you are allowed to take control. I feel like by being one of the youngest in my family I am not taken as seriously as I should be by others in my family. But life just be's that way sometimes. So to get off my soap box for the evening, just do you. Do what makes you happy. Because at the end of the day, YOU are the only one you have to answer to. And if you are happy with your life then screw all of the background noise. |
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Blog 3.17.18
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Blog 3.14.18Just because you start off on the wrong foot, doesn't mean that you have to keep the hate going. As of late I have started trying to nurture a relationship that started out terrible. We literally got into an argument the first time we met. Granted we were both drinking, and there was a major miscommunication! But the bottom line was that there was this tension that no one was talking about. We played nice when we were around family or in public, but we both knew shit was not good.
I am trying by best to grow the hell up. I am 23 and I still let the little shit bother me, when it isn't necessary. I could go into my side of the story and all the he said she said crap & talk about all the details of the fight- but it's unimportant. The point being, I think is young adults; mainly women we seem to feel the need to hold a grudge and keep score. And really all it is is a really drawn out pissing contest. And as girls, we both sit to pee, so we both lose. Why do we feel the need to keep "having issues" with others just because of one incident? Is it because we want to save face around our other friends? Or are we really that damn sensitive?! Something tells me its the first option. It's okay to make up and be friends after a fight or miscommunication. But if you can't get over whatever happened then keep to yourself. Don't go pretending that alls cool when it's not. All that's going to do is perpetuate the problem. Now, this girl and I don't really have an option but to get our shit together because our significant others are related... but its taken about 3 years now for this to start. But better late than never. I'm not saying that we arr having sleep overs & drinking wine while braiding each others hair, but we are trying. And isn't that all that anyone wants out of a friend? Someone who tries. She texted me late last night to tell me how she has been keeping up with my blog, and it melted my heart. It really made me feel good, not only about myself, but about how much we had grown in the last few months. She is a good human, and I would like to be close with her one day- we are hopefully getting there, but it'll take time. Like all things- when rushed; its shit. So thank you Tiffany, for being a good person, and I am excited to mend this friendship. |
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Blog 3.13.18
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Blog 3.10.18Guns... guns... guns. Its a touchy subject as of late. I don't know how some of you reading will feel about my views, but that is why this is my blog and not yours. I feel as though a gun is something that is to be respected and handled with care. Not fear. A gun can be a dangerous object if not used correctly. As a child, I knew that we had guns in our home, I also knew that I was not to touch them unless I was with my parents. With that being said, I was taught the proper way to handle a gun as well. That way it was not some taboo thing to be afraid of.
As an adult, I was in a situation a few summers back where I was at the wrong place at the wrong time, and someone pulled out a gun and began shooting. I was with two other people, I did not drive, and I didn't know where the hell I was. It was one of the most terrifying moments of my life. Not long after that I took the class and test to obtain my CWP (concealed weapons permit). For those who are unaware, you must take a 6 hour course accompanied by a written test, as well as a shooting test. It is not cheep to do this either. During that class the driving point that is being made is how important safety is. Going to the range is not only something that my husband and I do often, but it's something that my entire family enjoys too. My dad, mom, little brother, and two sisters. We all go, and have a great time. Guns should never be something that you tell your children to fear, because if they are told to be afraid and you yourself are not knowledgeable, what happens if your child God forbid were ever in a situation where they would need to use one, they wouldn't know how to. I also feel compelled to make the point that I think there should be stricter gun laws. I think that there should be a more lengthy screening process. See not all gun enthusiasts are looking to bury their assault rifles in the back yard to hide them from the government! But just because that may be in place doesn't mean that ole Jimmy who buys a gun in '08, who seems as sane as they come, may not be the same Jimmy mentally in '16. Crack is illegal and yet we still have people over dosing on the streets from that everyday. My point being that even if something is illegal as hell, the people who are looking to do bad things will find a way to get their hands on the things they need. Guns will always be a hot button issue. I don't care if you are a Republican or a Democrat, if you are male or female, young or older... everyone and their moma has an opinion on guns. And opinions are like assholes, everyone has one. That; my friends is is my stance on guns and gun control. Now that was the readers' digest version. But you get the point. |
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Blog 3.8.18Having a blended family in any capacity is uncharted territory for me as my parents were married for 21 years before getting a divorce. I had a pretty normal childhood until I was about 13 and that's when shit hit the fan... but that't another post for another day (connect with me if it is a story that you would like to read about).
So, I won't bore you with the details of their divorce, but it was what it was- it had been a long time coming. Not too long after, my mom remarried. And she married this guy. Bobby. Now, it wasn't just Bobby that was joining our little ohana; he had two children as well- Jacob and Ashton. So it goes without saying that when were all together, it's a full house. It's an adjustment gaining a step-dad when you are in your 20's. Especially when you don't have any form of a relationship with your biological dad. Do you call him dad? Do you call him by his name? What?! I call Bobby, Bobby. Because that is his name. But if you know me personally, you know that when I speak about him, he. is. my. dad. period. And Ashton & Jacob are my brother and sister. No if's, and's, or but's about it. To say that this blending of families has been seamless would be a lie. There are issues, but there's issues in any family. I love what my little unit looks like (insert dick joke here). It's not everyday that you have a man completely step into the father role for two girls that he did not make. But, that's exactly what he's done. He is a special person. **Prime example: I literally just got a call from Bobby at 8PM tonight telling me about how he put a dog kibble in my mom's Bugals that she was seeking like a damn squirrel and SHE ATE IT!! He felt bad because she didn't know about it & felt the need to call and tell me because he knew I would love every bit of that** I wish I could be closer to my new siblings though. It's rough being the oldest of now 4 and living two hours away. I some times am unsure of what my role is in their lives, I want to be someone that they feel they can talk to and come to if they needed something, but if I am being honest, which is my goal here- I know I am not that person to them. At least not yet, and that is okay. I have learned that you can only control one thing, and that is how you react to your situation. I know that in order to be close with them, I will have to wait. I see my bio-sister; Savanna and Ashton getting along and getting closer and it makes my heart happy. Because Savanna and I grew up almost 9 years apart, so it is hard for us to relate to each other. Life is messy and unpredictable- but your family- whatever it may look like is the only one you get. I chose to embrace the new and love what it had to offer. |
Blog 3.7.18
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Mug from https://www.facebook.com/oneofakindgallerysc/
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Blog 3.6.28
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Blog 3.5.18
Stopping the Glorification of "Busy"
So when I first got started in my career I made a mistake I feel that most of us do as young adults. We confuse the word "busy" with "productive". Now don't get me wrong, I do have busy days and I do have productive days. But I can also have busy days that aren't productive. Learn early in your career that busy isn't necessarily a positive thing. It is all subjective yes, but think about this, missing a date night because you are working late. Once isn't a big deal, hell, twice can be forgiven, but when it becomes a habit, that is when we have a problem. When you are missing out on family events or time with your friends, it is easy to justify it because you are making money. Again, I am not saying that you shouldn't make work a priority. If you know me, you know I work well over 40 hours a week, and so does my husband, and he has a company that we both work for when we are not at our respective day jobs. Work is great! Hell, I wish more people in our (my) generation had a better work ethic! What I am saying is just because you may be getting started in your career and probably feel like you need to prove yourself does not by any means mean that you must sacrifice your personal life to do so. Letting everyone know that you will be late to Thanksgiving dinner because you have a contract to write or you have a deadline to meet, doesn't make you appear successful, it just drives home the point to those who mean the most that you are putting something else (whatever it is) ahead of them.
I live and die by my calendar. If it isn't on there, it doesn't exist. I don't put every little thing on there, but I do put my priorities on there. I have my day-to-day must do's, and I have my time with my friends and family on my calendar as well. But, if you aren't doing what is on there then you are missing the point. It takes a little discipline, but anything can become a skill in just 66 days. My advise, if this is something that you are struggling with would be to just start by looking at your calendar everyday- add things take things off- but all in all, just look at it. Make it a habit to engage with your daily outline first. Then go from there.
Young people who who strive for more, need a healthy balance between work and play. My personal opinion (not based on any stat) is a "70/30 Rule"; 70% of my week is work, and 30% is play. You do deserve to enjoy the money you are making, and you need to be okay- like really o.k.a.y with putting away the laptop/phone/tablet/whatever & be fully preset in what you are doing. I'll end this post with one of my favorite quotes: "Be where you are... otherwise you will miss your life"- Buddha
I live and die by my calendar. If it isn't on there, it doesn't exist. I don't put every little thing on there, but I do put my priorities on there. I have my day-to-day must do's, and I have my time with my friends and family on my calendar as well. But, if you aren't doing what is on there then you are missing the point. It takes a little discipline, but anything can become a skill in just 66 days. My advise, if this is something that you are struggling with would be to just start by looking at your calendar everyday- add things take things off- but all in all, just look at it. Make it a habit to engage with your daily outline first. Then go from there.
Young people who who strive for more, need a healthy balance between work and play. My personal opinion (not based on any stat) is a "70/30 Rule"; 70% of my week is work, and 30% is play. You do deserve to enjoy the money you are making, and you need to be okay- like really o.k.a.y with putting away the laptop/phone/tablet/whatever & be fully preset in what you are doing. I'll end this post with one of my favorite quotes: "Be where you are... otherwise you will miss your life"- Buddha
Blog 3.3.18
Letter to my teenage self...
I would start with the cliché, "hey, it gets better", but we all know that. When you are in your teens life blows. Everything is the end of the world! But, you and I both know what life looks like right now.
You are in for a tough road. Yeah, you think you love him and you will be together forever, but you wont. Yeah, living at your grandparents' house suuuucks, but its only for a little while. You can do anything for a short time. Anything. You know that new boy you met with the buzzed head and beard? Give him a chance and stop being a dick. Get your oil changed more often, and don't be so hard on your mom. Shes trying.
Hug your aunt more often, shes done something for you that gave you a better chance at life.
You are so much smarter than you give yourself credit for, trust me.
Spend more time with Mahaley... You wont be friends for much longer. Its not a fight that ends you; its life. You both will move in different directions. Both wonderful, but it doesn't change the sting of loss.
Appreciate Saturdays, you will soon know what it is like to work the weekend.
YOU ARE ALLERGIC TO TYLENOL!
Most importantly, learn to love yourself more. Learn to have a greater understanding of who you are as a person. Hold tight to what you believe in, and use more positive words when speaking to yourself. You are an amazing human, you will do amazing things, and you will grow so much in such a short time. Speak up more, because you are so smart, and we don't find our voice until we are in our 20's. Be at peace with the quite, and embrace the struggle, it molds you into something so much more than you think.
Love,
Harley Lauren Murphy
I would start with the cliché, "hey, it gets better", but we all know that. When you are in your teens life blows. Everything is the end of the world! But, you and I both know what life looks like right now.
You are in for a tough road. Yeah, you think you love him and you will be together forever, but you wont. Yeah, living at your grandparents' house suuuucks, but its only for a little while. You can do anything for a short time. Anything. You know that new boy you met with the buzzed head and beard? Give him a chance and stop being a dick. Get your oil changed more often, and don't be so hard on your mom. Shes trying.
Hug your aunt more often, shes done something for you that gave you a better chance at life.
You are so much smarter than you give yourself credit for, trust me.
Spend more time with Mahaley... You wont be friends for much longer. Its not a fight that ends you; its life. You both will move in different directions. Both wonderful, but it doesn't change the sting of loss.
Appreciate Saturdays, you will soon know what it is like to work the weekend.
YOU ARE ALLERGIC TO TYLENOL!
Most importantly, learn to love yourself more. Learn to have a greater understanding of who you are as a person. Hold tight to what you believe in, and use more positive words when speaking to yourself. You are an amazing human, you will do amazing things, and you will grow so much in such a short time. Speak up more, because you are so smart, and we don't find our voice until we are in our 20's. Be at peace with the quite, and embrace the struggle, it molds you into something so much more than you think.
Love,
Harley Lauren Murphy
Blog: 3.2.18: Relying on Your "I Don't Know's"As humans we are afraid of being wrong. We are even more afraid of being told we are wrong in front of others. Like I said before, I am 23 years old; so I am still pretty young. I am learning now how to welcome the idea of being wrong. Believe me it's tough. As someone who is just getting into their forever career, its rough being told that I am doing or saying something I shouldn't. At first I took a major offence to it. But as part of being self-aware as young adults we need to accept the fact that we are not always right, or the best. I remember getting a participation award just for being on the Soccer team growing up. We are taught at a young age that we are the best, now I know that no parent in their right mind would tell their child anything but that, but its simply not true. We as millinnals need to learn that there will always be someone who is better and someone who is not as good. Its the way the world works. We need that mix of talent to survive.
But there is another extreme to this whole topic. When we use "I don't know" as a crutch to not welcome being corrected. You may do it and have just not had someone tell you that you do it. I was lucky enough to have someone who cared enough about my success and me as a person to tell me to get my head out of my ass... not in those words of course (in case you read this Steven). But he told me that I did in fact rely on my "I don't Know's". It clicked. He had called me out not only for being wrong but for doing something wrong as well. Talk about a kick to the nuts. But he was right. I really hate to say that. But it's true. I was to hung up on not being wrong that I was shielding myself from making mistakes so much so that I wasn't open to learning as well. It's okay to be wrong or to genuinely not know the answer. It's when you close yourself off from learning that you being to have a problem. It is a hard pill to swallow I know, but its a pill worth taking. I have high hope for us millinnals, we just need to work on a few things. |
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Blog 3.1.1820 Facts about Me:
1. I work in Real Estate 2. I have been married for 887 days today 3. I have two dogs- one blue pit and a yellow lab/pit mix 4. I have an addiction to TJMaxx 5. Starbucks is my guilty pleasure 6. I try to eat healthy, but McDonalds Chicken Nuggets are crack 7. I have a filthy mouth and make dirty jokes as often as I can 8. I gained a little brother (19) and sister (14) about 2 years ago 9. I am in fact named after a motorcycle in case you were wondering 10. I drive a 2015 4Runner and I LOVE IT! 11. I still pay most of my bills by check 12. I don't like beer (but I do like wine) 13. My current jam is Pondcreek Road 14. I have auditory hallucinations 15. I currently don't have someone I would consider my "bestfriend"- but I'd love to meet her! 16. My mom is my go- to for any and everything!! 17. I have my CWP and I do carry 18. Religion confuses me 19. I am scared of the dark 20. I love roller coasters BONUS FACT! It took me close to an hour and a half to come up with 20 facts about myself! |
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Charleston, SC - The Holy City is where I get to call home. Well, if I'm being honest; right on the outside of Charleston. A little town called Moncks Corner. I get the best of both worlds- I get to live on a small lake where things move a little slower, but I get the pleasure of walking along Palms on Cobble Stone streets while listening to horse and buggies trot along (no surprise that I love seafood). This beautiful city is rich in history and covered in sky high churches.
Moncks Corner on the other hand so much more slow moving. Its almost like taking a trip back in time when you go down Main St. You can see Howard's Restraint... which still only takes cash, and Crafts Plus is always a wonderful little shop to stop in at. I like spending my time on the lake or river with both my bitches and my husband. We will just go out, pack some stuff for lunches and of course the most important thing; beer. And we will set out for a day filled with buzzed chats and sunburns. |