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Just a MILLENNIAL trying to navigate ADULTHOOD 

To the Girl without A Tribe

8/7/2019

69 Comments

 
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​You is smart, you is kind, you is important. Remember that.

We all see them, those groups of girls who have been best friends since high school who are all insanely beautiful and look like they are just doing life better than the rest of us. Always out with each other, in weddings, their boyfriends are friends. It's all just so... cute. It may be difficult to not get jealous even. But know this, that there are far more girls like you, girls who don't have a"tribe", girls who have many friends in different circles, or girls who have a few close friends. Who knows, you may have just one best friend and a couple acquaintances; people who haven't quite got the pleasure of getting to know just how wonderful you are yet.

Whatever girl you are, know that it is okay. Those groups are amazing too! If you are part of one of those girl tribes, you go Glenn Co Co, you go! Because it takes so much work to maintain and nurture relationships for so long. But today, I am talking to those girls who stand alone, the ones who float from circle to circle, without a care. You my dear are not broken because you don't have a large group of girls on your coat tails every Saturday night. It doesn't make you odd, or mean that you are not likable because you don't hang out with the same people every week.

Look at is a strength, that you are that independent that you make your own rain, and you dance to the beat of your own drum. If you make enough music, people will dance. They may dance with you for a season, or for your entire life. Either way, remember that you are not alone, in being the girl who migrates without a set knit of friends. There are more girls like you than you realize.


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69 Comments
Haley
8/7/2019 05:52:11 pm

❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

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Angela Cook
2/28/2020 06:03:33 pm

❤💋

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Nancy
2/29/2020 10:26:44 am

I am a girl to stands alone in many circles. I love it. I don’t need a tribe🙏❤️💯

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Gia link
2/29/2020 01:38:36 pm

Right there with ya 😎

La La
2/29/2020 08:58:46 pm

I needed this!! Thank you for sharing and YESSSS YOU GO GLEN CO CO!!! 🙌🏼

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Memaw
8/10/2019 08:37:50 am

I have never belonged to any tribe but my family tribe, which includes you, beautiful and talented young woman. 💚

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Ashley
2/27/2020 08:06:59 pm

Yesssssss! 🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼

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April
2/27/2020 08:44:31 pm

Ive always stood alone and im okay with standing alone

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Rhonda C
2/27/2020 08:52:21 pm

This is so my daughter! I love you sis!

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GraceDumesnil
2/27/2020 09:28:04 pm

Well said.

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Shivonne
2/28/2020 05:50:18 am

I’ve always loved having lots of friend groups & feel blessed that so many strong women in our family are leaders & feel the same. We always have an eye out to be inclusive & lend an ear or shoulder.

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Linda
2/28/2020 05:51:47 am

Great!

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Katie
2/28/2020 05:52:22 am

This is absolutely beautiful!!!

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Kayla
2/28/2020 10:34:33 am

I loved this and going through this now so needed this. Thank you.

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Elaine Osborne
2/28/2020 11:15:41 am

Ready for a tribe!

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Krissy
2/28/2020 11:30:51 am

I've really been struggling with "belonging" lately. I don't know how I didn't realize that being a partial part of several groups is a gift. Thank God and you for this uplift!

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Sara
2/28/2020 07:57:23 pm

Thank you for putting it this way! I will appreciate my gifts. ❤

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Carrie
2/28/2020 12:12:07 pm

This has been my reality since I was a little girl, and my dad being in the Air Force and looking for work afterward led us to move several times growing up. I was always envious of those "tribe" girls. But later on in life I realized I had learned the skill of making new friends and getting along with a variety of people that these people had never been forced to learn. I also think that experience having to do things on your own means I'm willing to venture into territories alone (literally and figuratively) that other people aren't comfortable enough to. I don't think either way of life is superior to the other; they each come with their own perks. I've just learned to embrace the perks and ask God for help with the pitfalls.

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Gerri
3/1/2020 09:29:59 am

Thank you for putting into words the thoughts in my head! I'm an Army brat (mom was in service) so this makes total sense to me and is a great explanation for understanding. ❤

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Sherry Sparks link
3/1/2020 09:44:15 am

I know exactly how you feel. I grew up in an Air Force family and moved around a lot. I have a few friendships that have lasted since elementary school, but we do not live near one another, so can’t get together. Sometimes it is lonely, I wish I had a tribe. But most of the time I am just thankful for the friends I have made since I married and settled down in a small town. Most of my friends are not from this town and did not grow up here. There are a couple of exceptions. But I would not trade the opportunities I had in each place I lived and the friends I had there, whether I still know where they are or not.

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Jj
3/2/2020 07:44:53 pm

Beautifully said!!!!

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Marcie
2/28/2020 12:12:15 pm

Thier are a lot of us Girls & Ladies out there like that. Your not alone.

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Marie
2/28/2020 12:33:55 pm

I don't need a tribe, have never needed groups nor a few if they are not the right people for me. I stand alone most of the time cause I don't follow the crowd. I am ok with that. I find most real friends or people that get to know the true me hang around for a very long time so I have 3 close friends that have been in my life for 40 years.
I know of those fair weather friends and I would rather be alone.

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Sherilynn
2/29/2020 03:39:28 pm

We dont require a tribe in the sense of night numbers and I am exactly the same with my three. Who needs a crowd of lukewarm friends when quality is better for some of us than quantity. I have usually has a larger group from coworkers.

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Kay
3/1/2020 10:19:50 pm

I agree about this statement. I cannot stand fake people or rude ones too. Stand tall and free don’t put up with nasty mean girls.

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Lisa
2/28/2020 01:39:13 pm

I myself have gone through life unlike the ones that hangout or meet every weekend. I enjoy my small family circle and a few good friends. You yourself are enough and you are beautiful

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Heidi smith link
2/28/2020 02:25:48 pm

This so resonated with me.... thank you x

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Tyra
2/28/2020 02:54:58 pm

🙌🏽❤️ Thank you!

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Adrian Hulin
2/28/2020 03:32:20 pm

❤😘 This touched me to my core!!! I have always stood alone, and I never had a tribe, so I really do know how to be alone all too well....but I have come to terms with it, but, from time to time, I get lonely and wish for a group of girlfriends but then I remember that the loneliest tends to be the strongest 💜👊🏾

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Lena
2/28/2020 05:07:21 pm

I am in this group and love the freedom to choose to like everyone

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sarah rantala link
2/28/2020 05:08:31 pm

This! ❤ It has bothered me from time to time about not having my own " tribe" but I recently started my own blog & realize I have far more friends that support me than I even thought.

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Brooke
2/28/2020 05:48:20 pm

Thank you for the touching encouragement. I’ve been struggling with this for some time, and really needed this.

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Sierra
2/28/2020 06:12:48 pm

I really needed this! Thank you!

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Leah
2/28/2020 07:45:23 pm

My tribe they left a while back. Missing them at this time has really been so hard. Miss miss miss 💔😢 My love will always be is close in my ❤

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Nicole
2/28/2020 10:29:27 pm

I have that friends since high school tribe and we take adorable pics together lol but it’s not often we can hang bc we are so busy. Also, let’s not forget the non Instagram moments of truth, one is struggling trying to have a baby, two are so busy and each have 3 kiddos, one has a kiddo with special needs and is a single mom, one struggles with autoimmune/anxiety, and then there’s me 30 pounds overweight and in and out of depression. Don’t let Instagram fool you it’s not like these adorable group of friends live in dreamland and hang out every weekend with no worries. PS I’ll be your friend if you need one. Xoxo

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Gail
2/29/2020 01:45:51 am

Forget the tribe;....I'd take just ONE friend if I could figure out how to make that happen! :(

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Linda
3/1/2020 10:29:40 am

Maybe all us loner types actually have a tribe right here!! Let’s do it

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Caity
2/29/2020 04:24:26 am

😍😍😍😍😍

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P
2/29/2020 06:10:01 am

"You is smart", doesn't sound very smart.

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A
2/29/2020 06:29:02 am

It’s a quote from the movie “The Help”...

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Nicole
2/29/2020 07:15:44 am

That Sweatshirt ❤️❤️❤️❤️

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Suz
2/29/2020 08:04:20 am

Thank you!!! I really need to read that today!!!❤️

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Lyn
2/29/2020 10:55:03 am

Everyone needs Friends even the "loners". We don't get through this life without them. It may be the one who aggravates you or a secret pal but we all have them. Treasure them, they help keep the 'blues' away on bad days, and make you feel good about yourself.🌻 🥰 🎗

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Tina
2/29/2020 12:09:10 pm

You girls probably don’t realize it but the ones who have the “tribe“ have just as many lonely moments as you. Just because you know how to look in public with your friends or whatever doesn’t mean you don’t have your little personal battles going on. The key is to be happy in your own skin and that attitude radiates from you and you draw people near. But also you have to be able to be happy with your own self when you’re alone. That goes for the tribe girls too. Bottom line: everyone wears an invisible sign on their chest that says “I want to feel important“. You have to be a good listener and have lots of empathy for others. Life is hard sometimes, everyone has battles.

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Ashley link
2/29/2020 05:10:51 pm

This was something I needed to read. For as long as I can remember, I have never had a 'tribe'. Heck, I don't even have one super close girl friend. I have a few friends that I occasionally meet up with. Most of the time, I am okay with this, but sometimes I get lonely too. However, I have learned to be insanely independent. I have learned that I don't need a group of friends to go out and have fun doing the things that I want to do. I travel alone to the concerts that I want to see and do 5K's on my own. I have an amazing husband. So while having a close girl friend would be great, I won't settle for a fake friendship to get it.

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Anom
2/29/2020 06:45:58 pm

Let's use a different word than tribe. It's insensitive to indigenous people and their communities. Come on.

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Claire
3/1/2020 09:28:55 am

Oh for Pete's sake, lighten up.

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Alex
3/2/2020 12:21:21 am

Tribe [trahyb]
-noun
1. any aggregate of people united by ties of descent from a common ancestor, community of customs and traditions, adherence to the same leaders, etc.

2. a local division of an aboriginal people.

3. a division of some other people.

4. a class or type of animals, plants, articles, or the like.

5. Animal Husbandry.a group of animals, especially cattle, descended through the female line from a common female ancestor.

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Sue
2/29/2020 08:30:49 pm

I have never had a tribe. Oh, it looks like I have many friends, but they are acquaintances. When the job or project ends, I am alone again. To be honest, I am jealous of women who have friends to grab lunch or dinner with, or go to a movie on a whim. I work an hour from home. I worship 1/2 hour from home. I have one dear friend, and we try to see each other once a month. My husband is non-social, so we are non-social. I will retire soon and I dread it. My husband will expect me to be home 24/7, and I will suffocate. But he is ill, in chronic pain, and I will become a full time caregiver. With no tribe.

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Angela link
4/30/2020 09:18:41 am

Sue, as a caregiver myself, I am a nurse, I recognize and can appreciate the feelings you share about your fear of having no “tribe” and your husband expecting you to be home “24/7” when you retire. You are so blessed to be connected with a church already because so many are not. And when you are the main or only caregiver of a loved one, especially in your own home, it can be very wearing on a person. You are also blessed that you can see this before you retire and can take steps to help ahead of time to help you deal with caregiver stress. There are also support groups for caregivers and respite help you can ask for from your church, your family or close friends, other people who you would trust to be of good help for your husband. I will pray for you that you can be able to reach out for the help you need during this time! It’s never too late! Blessings ♥️🙏🏻😇

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Kay Dedrick
3/1/2020 04:49:06 am

I dont need a group of people around me, only a few that at are true friends the right friends.
I'm a stand alone person, dont follow crowds.
And I am ok with that. I dont do drama.
Been hurt been betrayed. If your my friend I will help you any way I can

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Wanda
3/1/2020 05:03:27 am

I am that girl without a tribe

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Mandy
3/1/2020 05:15:18 am

I feel it to be very lonely at times!!! It makes me sad!!!

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Cab
3/1/2020 05:38:53 am

I’m an extrovert without a tribe. I feel if one doesn’t have something more to offer, such as, playing a musical instrument, artistic & creative then you’re left standing on the sidelines. I’ve tried making friends, but the ‘tribe’ has never materialized! It’s a struggle to feel worth something when you’re alone a lot. I’m an only child so no sibling family. 😪

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Asya Goss
3/1/2020 08:05:13 am

Thank you so much! This made me cry.

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Traci
3/1/2020 09:43:49 am

Do I ever understand exactly what you mean
Thanks for sharing....it means so much to know that I’m not the only one who feels this way

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Jessie
3/1/2020 09:47:25 am

Love this!!💜 It’s so true, it is hard sometimes & a little lonely to be this girl without a tribe! It definitely makes you strong & self sufficient though👊🏼

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Judy
3/1/2020 05:38:44 pm

I use to have aloof friends. I was married and we mostly hung out with his friends and when he died I found out I didn’t have that may left. It can be hard

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Alexis
3/2/2020 12:22:41 am

Needed this! Thank you! I've always wanted a tribe, but now feel better for not having one. I appreciate you.

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Amy Waring link
3/2/2020 08:19:17 am

Well said and just what I needed to hear today. I'm one with friends in different circles and I love close time with a close friend or two. I see those groups too and sometimes talk myself down, like why haven't I kept friends my whole life. I moved away from home and started over at 28. I may be socially awkward I don't now. But thanks for sharing your thoughts!

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Patty
3/2/2020 10:59:20 am

This is so my daughter! She would love to have you all as her tribe! Her name is Haleigh and she has a beautiful heart & soul.

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Buffy
3/2/2020 03:29:26 pm

Yes!!! 🔥

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Kathy
3/2/2020 05:29:00 pm

For me, my friend groups have been very seasonal. My friends For many years were based on the parents of my children’s friends. Or whatever activities we were participating in. I believe that ‘friend tribes’ come and go. I am thankful for my big friend groups and my one to one friends. I am blessed to have both.

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Kelly
3/3/2020 06:30:41 am

I have always felt alone. Never really fit into any area and most of my friends are guys. When you have a guy they think oh you messing around with the others. So this hit home this morning with me and glad to know I am not alone. I enjoy going out and sucks that I do it sometimes by myself but I do. I hope everyone has a good day for I also know the Good Lord is in control and all is well

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Denise
3/3/2020 07:08:17 am

This goes for guys as well. But I do not have a tribe, I wish I did cuz I get pretty lonely.

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Lauren BB
3/3/2020 04:46:16 pm

Your use of the word ‘tribe’ is offensive. Stop taking our culture and traditions and white washing it.

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Dawn
3/3/2020 05:16:19 pm

I’ve never been a “tribe” sort of gal until April of last year, when I met a group of women at my gym. We all bonded over wanting to better ourselves. We did 5k’s together, we talked everyday, had parties, we were all supportive of each other and it was almost like having a second family, how close we all were. Fast forward to February of this year- and I made 1 mistake that I have apologized repeatedly for, and this group of about 20 “friends” have thrown me away like a dirty old rag. Only about 5 of them still speak to me.
You’d think that the ones that don’t speak to me have NEVER made a mistake in their entire life the way they have alienated me. It sucks when you find out that your “tribe” wasn’t really a tribe to begin with- but more of a judgy clique that talks crap about “friends”.
REALLY sucks that this was a group of gym friends, and I’ve yet to be able to return to the gym bc I have such dread and fear of seeing these fake friends.
It’s like I never existed to those people... it literally feels like I’m in high school dealing with this petty stuff!

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Shirley
3/9/2020 05:54:58 pm

I know that I'm surrounded by hungry vampires. I try so hard to make local friends and then I go home and in my dreams they come for me ready for the kill so when I wake up I'm gasping for breath from running so hard before the catch me to devour me. I'm in search for a tribe with a pure heart.

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Shannon link
3/19/2022 05:22:55 am

Amen!

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